2015 is here, OH NO!

2014 was a very interesting year. I got a job, we got to go to southern California to visit family for Christmas for the first time in years, and I was diagnosed with carpal tunnel. (Sigh)

As time moves on, I am looking forward to 2015. I know there are new adventures in life to look forward to and challenges. I am excited about that, but I am also very sad, as this is the year my oldest daughter graduates. Yikes, already. I guess I was hoping it would not come so soon. 

Maddie is really having a good Senior year and has been such a great help to me and her mom. We really love spending time with her, and now she may be leaving for college or beauty school at the end of this year. 

I know that God will be with her, but I wish the year would slow down and I could have a little more time with my daughter at home. Please 2015, .....slow down,....... just a little. 

sniff. 

So Phil Robertson can't use his freedom of speech rights without consequence.....

So, what is Phil Robertson supposed to do? Lie or just be quiet and not answer the question? You tell me, is this country looking more and more like an empire or what?

I am a Christian, and I believe that the Bible is the Word of God. I believe what it says and I strive to live my life according to it. Because if you love God, you love His word, His precepts, and His law.

What I see coming from A&E and the media, is exactly what they accuse Christians of being. Intolerant. Intolerant of anything the Bible says, and intolerance for anyone who actually speaks it out loud.

Phil Robertson shared his opinion and then quoted the Bible (1 Corinthians 6:9-10). Now, his way of stating things is very blunt and not very pretty. But in no way did I think he was espousing hate for homosexuals.

If you are a Christian, and you read God's word, then you know, you can't hate people and call yourself a Christian. That is not God's way, and that is not what Jesus did while he was on this earth.
He loved everyone, whether prostitutes, thieves, adulterers, or any other kind of sinner. He showed grace to all of them and forgave them their sins. His word says, I can give everything away and have great faith, but if I have not love, I am worthless, a clanging gong. (1 Corinthian 13:1-3 paraphrased).

So I find it very frustrating, when a Christian who is in the limelight, tells the truth in love and people lose it.

We live in America. And in this country there is freedom of speech and freedom of religion. And it seems funny to me, that people can say as many awful things as they want about Christians and no one bats an eye. But you speak scripture out loud in public and people want to crucify you!"

It's very simple, the Bible is not popular because it tells us what our sins are, and it tells us to change. And when you are living in sin, you hate that. You hate anyone or anything, telling you, you're in sin. But that is exactly what the Bible does and is supposed to do.

What people are actually saying is, "I hate your God, I hate your Bible, shut up and let me live in my sin."

I guess the truth hurts, and we don't want to hear it. Otherwise, why do people get so mad?

God loves us, no matter what we've done, and as Christians we should do the same. But that doesn't mean Phil Robertson, or other Christians should lie to people or the press, just so they won't be offended. Jesus never apologizes for the truth. Jesus never said,  "I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but this is sin in your life." But He does point out sin our lives. And He does it in love, without malice or hate towards that person, because He loves them and wants to save them.

Now I can't go into detail about the Bible and expect everyone to agree or understand. The Bible states, if you are not a believer, then the Bible will not make sense to you. It will just sound foolish. But I can say, that speaking the truth from God's word, out loud in public, is our right. You may not agree with what is said, and that's ok. But what A&E did, was penalize Phil Robertson, for exercising his right as an American and as a Christian.

Intolerance indeed!

Art You Can Use Made from Recycled Material |Built 2 Rock.com

Art You Can Use Made from Recycled Material |Built 2 Rock.com

My Struggle

I have been through the this struggle before. The struggle to accomplish anything. It is one I believe we all go through, just not the same route.

I want to go to the place that works best for me, but it is not easy to get there. 

I spent over 20 years working in a field that was not appealing at all. I was in Law Enforcement. It was a well paid job, with really good benefits, but I found no joy in it. 

I don't think we are always going to be happy in our job, but I would hope we were happy or at least satisfied part of the time. 

But to be doing something the you really wanted to, and to enjoy that work....... that would be grand. 

So I find myself moving towards the goal of a job I enjoy, and it is really exciting! One of my passions has always been to either be a computer programmer or a computer tech. I love computers, working on computers, troubleshooting computers, figuring out computers. It is so satisfying to me. 

So to be getting educated in HTML for Web Design is very exciting indeed. 

I went to a class yesterday on how to find these classes and I was so stoked. It is a state run program that helps you find and attend online classes in some very lucrative jobs. I was so amazed when I finished the class and had found most of the classes, if not all that I need for my new chosen profession. 

I can't wait to get started and I know it's going to be great. 

Thank you Lord for this opportunity and I pray you find yours too!

Update 2012

Here were in 2012 and I have not added a new blog. I have had a bit of writers block. I actually have a draft, but have not been able to come to a good conclusion as to what should be said and what shouldn't. It has been a very tumultuous year for us. A lot of groaning as well as growing!

I have been out of work since August of 2010. Well, I was officially medically retired in 2010. I have not been working since 2008 or 2009, can't remember. That is bad, can't remember. I went back to work for a month, in July of 2009 if I remember correctly. I was very excited, thinking that I was on my way back to working and so forth. Then they called me after almost a month and said, your doctor still says you are limited. We need you to go home......and I never returned. So weird.

So, I am out of work, being paid half of what I used to make and in deep need of a job. But because I am disabled, it can't be a physical job. This limits my choices of jobs to such a degree, that here we are at the end of 2012 and I still don't have a job.

My passion, and the area of interest I feel God leading me towards, is Web Design.

I have prayed a lot about this and Web Design keeps coming up. So, I delved into it, and low and behold, I love it. I am not totally surprised. I have a love for computers, and hopefully someday programming. I have always wanted to write my own program. I still have a yearning to do so; that is on hold for the moment. I am feeling led to Web Design and I enjoy it immensely.

My first customer is a friend. A long time friend. She is my wife Nicole's friend from a long time back. The used to work together at a building inspection company. Jeff, her husband started a business of taking old musical instruments and turning them into Art/Furniture. His stuff is fantastic. So Kim asked if I would be willing to make them a web site. They had already made one, but they were not happy with it.

We decided that this would be a test drive, to see if I could actually do it, so no payment was asked for. I figured if I was successful, then they would be a great reference. I plowed ahead and came up with something they both loved. I was very surprised. I was not as taken with it, but it did fit their needs.

So, now I am learning WordPress. I love WordPress. I am so impressed with it. I want more than anything to change the site of my only client, who doesn't pay me, to a WordPress site. I have been working on WordPress.com to learn and see what I could come up with. I love what I have already and it is just a skeleton. So, I have been a bit preoccupied and the blog has suffered.

Hopefully soon, I will be able to put up my next post in an attempt to encourage Christians and non Christians alike. God bless and have a fantastic Thanksgiving and Christmas!

Can't Get Away from Me!

Struggling with guilt? Feeling ashamed? This is something I think a lot of us struggle with. I struggle with it all the time. Guilt over things left unsaid, projects not completed, stumbling into sin that keeps coming up in my life, disobedience to God. 

I often feel that, this is who I am. This of course is SHAME! Guilt is how we feel when we've done something wrong, shame defines us. Who we are. How we think we will always be. We are just screwed up and that will never change. That is shame, for being who we are. 

I think, this, more than anything is the cause of alcoholism, drug addiction, depression, anger, self loathing, despair, feeling sorry for ourselves and not moving forward in our dreams. 

Wow, I know thats a lot, but when you think about it, isn't that the case? I am who I am, and if that carries a negative label with it, then we feel doomed. I can't get away from who I am. I will always be screwed up, I will always be a failure, I will always be a disappointment, I will always fall short, I will always make the same mistakes. Whatever your point of view is. Whatever your short coming is.

In our minds, nothing can change this and therefore, hopelessness sets in. We all deal with it differently. Covering it up the best we can with one of the vices I mentioned earlier, or just never putting yourself out there so you won't be discovered. Always hiding, putting up our best strong front, to keep anyone from knowing the truth.  

Truth is, we are all broken to some extent. None of us have it all together. But to some of us it is terrifying to think that someone may find us out. 

There is no way I can cover this subject in one entry, it would be to long, so this will be a series. I struggle with this daily, but have learned how to deal with it through Christ Jesus. The only way in my opinion, that we can deal with it. 

I was encouraged recently by reading a daily devotion I get from Greg Laurie that said, that if I still feel guilty when I do something wrong, then the Holy Spirit is working in my life and that's a good thing. If I don't feel anything, then it's time to be concerned. I am gonna leave you the link to that devotional, you should read it. I hope it encourages you as much as it did me.  

http://www.harvest.org/devotional/archive/devotion/2012-01-10.html

How Do we Hear God

How do we hear God?  Seems like a simple question, but it seems to be getting more & more difficult.

I didn't always understand that, God talking to me. Though, when I think back to my teenage and even childhood years, I can remember God talking to me. I remember Him telling me to stay away from certain situations, or how I really shouldn't be where I was at the time, and I remember doing things my way anyhow and suffering the consequences, wishing I would have listened to that still small voice inside me. I don't think I always recognized that as God, but I believe it was and is. 

I have been in a few too many conversations lately that have Christians questioning if God talks to them at all. They don't hear Him, or haven't heard Him lately. People have said to me, "God's not talking to me, or at least I am not hearing him." 

 I am convinced that God speaks to us all the time. He may be silent at times, when He is testing us. Not when He is trying to get out attention, which I believe is more often than we think. But, what does that sound like, how does He communicate with us. How does He communicate with you. Do you know.  

For me, it mostly sounds like my own voice, or just my thoughts inside my head. For some it's dreams, some a word of knowledge, that is someone else says exactly what God told you, or even visions. These are just some examples of the way God may talk to you, but we don't always recognize this as God. 

I believe we hear God all the time, but it is not always clear to us, because we are not thinking about God, and what He wants. 

When God talks to me, if I am thinking after the flesh, then His commands are frightening to me. Some examples of this might be, start a new ministry, or lead a bible study or leave that job, or witness to those people. I know that some don’t find this hard at all, but for me, it is. For me these commands are usually something I struggle with. 

The question becomes what should I do?   What would you do?  God is giving us a command.  I hate to admit this, but I usually procrastinate. I usually want to run away from the responsibility. The worries of the world become overwhelming to me. I have so many other responsibilities, when could I fit that in?  I start to make excuses:  I am not the right person to do this anyway, I am weak in my faith, I am not confident in my speaking ability.  Are you sure about this?  I hope that last one made you smile.  Like God doesn’t know what He is doing. 

I don’t know if that’s you, but I believe there are definitely others that have the same thinking reeling in their minds. I believe we all hear God, but we don’t want to hear Him, because He asks too much of us. He tells us to give up something, we don’t want to give up.  He tells us to do something, we don’t feel comfortable doing. At least in my mind, with my own thinking, with a fleshly outlook, that is how I see it.  What about you?

The funny thing is, none of this is a problem for God. He is going be right there with us. Giving us words to say, and then He will do the work that needs to be done, but He needs us to walk in obedience. If I remember correctly, my Pastor said once, God doesn’t need us for anything, He is all powerful and can do whatever He wants. But what He wants, is to do it through us. All through the Bible He does His will through His people. He sends Moses to bring the Israelites out of Egypt, He sends Jonah to warn the people of Nineveh, He sends Nehemiah to rebuild the wall around Jerusalem.  Do you believe He could have done all those things, without their help?   I sure do.  But He chose to use His people.  

God is talking to all of us, I am convinced of that. I as grow in my relationship with Christ, I am learning to listen and do more quickly than I used to, the things He commands. I still struggle with my selfish spirit, with my flesh, but as I grow in my walk and die to myself more and more, it becomes easier. 

The Bible says in James 4:1-3 “What is causing the quarrels and fights among you? Don’t they come from the evil desires at war within you? You want what you don’t have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can’t get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them. Yet you don’t have what you want because you don’t ask God for it. And even when you ask, you don’t get it because your motives are all wrong - you want only what will give you pleasure.” 

I cringe when I read that. Because it’s me. I want to be more like Him. It is a constant struggle, but as I spend more time in His word, and in prayer with Him, it gets easier. 

Listen, He’s calling you. He speaking to you daily, just listen to that still small voice. 

Reference to read: John 10:1-9 and Psalm 95:6-11